MetaKnigel If the Rule is Broken–Break It.

Paruresis

Paruresis, originally uploaded by Knigel.

I've been waiting a long time to surreptitiously sneak a photo of one of the many Korean cleaning ladies in the men's washrooms. Unlike Canada, it is a norm to see ladies cleaning up in the men's washrooms. This is a seeming contradiction, amongst many, to korea's sexual conservativism. While I'm careful about giving into ethnocentric assumptions intellectually, it's hard to say that I have no emotional hangups when trying to relieve myself with a kindly grandmother smiling up at me.

When I first found myself in this situation, I had no social script. There were no other men in the washroom from who I could casually follow example. I didn't know if I should just walk out or pretend that I only had to wash my hands. Instead I--probably more confidently than I ought to be--strolled up to the urinal, greeted her with the customary "안녕하세요!", took the sharpest aim I could, and reclaimed my territory all the while feeling guilty for any stray droplette.

The first time was certainly one of the culture shocks that has made me remember that I am indeed in a different country; however, this situation is quite minor compared to a few places like some pubs that have a single washroom of which both sexes use simultaneously. I'm pretty open-minded; however, there is absolutely nothing I can do from getting embarrassed after turning around and bumping into an attractive, but very flustered girl.

Pointing attention to these situations isn't meant to depict Korea as some strange land in which everything is backwards. Each country has it's own organically organised social constructions that result in an awkward situation. These situations are not unsimilar to the uncomfortable silence found when people share an elevator with each other.